Now that valentine is over and the whole gifts sharing and exchange between lovers is over, does that mean we will have to wait a full year again before we show love to those so dear to us. Those we call our own. Our spouse, our fiancee, our very own and most times those for whom our whole world revolves?

I don’t know if am too much of a sucker for love or if the problem is that i have a perfect view of how the world should look like but personally i think our relationships will grow better if we took time off our busy crazy schedules (Some schedules are so busily crazy indeed….) and make time for our loved ones. Make time to send flowers and cakes and treat that lady as specially as she deserves to be treated and just before the guys wait to bite my head off, am quick to say that love is reciprocal and even respect and if i do go on about respect today i guess its going to be a loooooong one because as i sit and type on this page, it’s my closing time already and forgive me but one part of me is out the door and am trying to make this as short as possible without ruining it and sending the message across as in my heart.
No matter how hard and tough we all look on the outside (I think i look tough sometimes but deep down really…… *smiles* I’m not as tough as i look and i wonder if it is a front to even protect myself. I still find it difficult to figure out)
Back to the gist, the world’s sickness going on all around presently all boil down to a lack of love. All of the fights, wars, crisis, terrorist attacks, bomb blasts and so so tragic situations all boil down to a lack of love from the source. The source is the family. The man and the woman who come together to have a child. That smallest unit, small as it seems is the very genesis of so much more. Look, this isn’t foolish or wrong thinking, it’s plain truth speaking. The world is so love sick, people are worn and forlorn, people are heartbroken and depressed, people see no reason to live because their lives are so damn empty and they take to drugs, they take to drinking, they are just trying to find solace somewhere and hide under this guises. They are pained in their hearts, they are empty and forlorn, there’s no reason to live for them and all of what they see is cloudy and hazy, it’s a cold, cold world that God shouldn’t make us travel, hard to come out of and it all goes wrong from Love little as it seems but much more empowering than our eyes can see, than our minds can fathom.
The long term effects of loving and being loved in return, being appreciated are happiness that money can’t buy, fulfillment and peace in our world.
Terrorism is been fought so wrongly and that’s why we aren’t achieving any results! See how far it has taken America to! We can’t achieve peace that way. Let’s go back to the roots, the very basics, the very foundation, it can’t be over- emphasised, let’s go back to LOVE!

“Play the Game!” that’s the word my cousin told me after i had finished narrating my end of the love story turned sour that went on between me and his friend he had introduced to me for a “serious” relationship.
I was on my way back from work sometime last year only to get a call from my cousin that lives in the U.S who rarely calls me except on special occasions. After going through the preliminaries, he then went on to say the “real” reason why he was calling and that was because a close friend of his has seen my picture with him and wanted to get to know me. I am not a type for long distance relationships. Relationships where you get to see has its own fair share of problems talk less of relationship where you communicate by other means other than that which is even more important, PHYSICALLY. There’s nothing that beats physical communication, you see the gestures, the body language, the closeness, you read if the words spoken from the mouth matches the one spoken by the body. Now so much for digressing back to the main gist.

He introduced this guy to me and we got talking. Honestly, i wasn’t interested in the begininning because of all the reasons i just gave above so i just wasn’t into it but as we progressed and got closer and the calls longer and the texts like every three hours, America didn’t seem so far anymore, there were no boundaries, they just disappeared into space and as the bond grew, we made plans for the now and the future.

My doubts flew away and i became trusting, i could call it love then if you asked me. Where it all went wrong i don’t know but all i remember where issues coming up for him with times being hard for him and he needing a new job to meet rising demands, been accepted in graduate school and no money to fund it and not knowing if he should defer his admission till the next session.

All i can remember was the “I am busy busy excuse”, “I will call you later” and the calls not coming and then the not picking of my calls for days , no return of text messages and then finally asking my cousin to check on him to see if he’s okay and being told that he is. Sat for days waiting for that call that never came to pass, promises broken and then those plans we both made!Ah! I wonder how i made it through those days but i did somehow in some unexplainable manner because truth be told, i was broken and all i could remember telling myself was “but you knew this before” and my cousin says after my full narration “Why didn’t you play the game?” Game??? Which Game? I didn’t know there was a game to be played. He showed me love and i only responded to love. It is only natural i guess. Was there a game been played and i wasn’t aware? Or was i such a dumb player i didn’t know i should have played and kept my heart aside?

I am sorry i don’t know how to play that game. I have failed in that aspect. I am either IN or OUT! When did matters of the heart become a game of scrabble and chess?

Hello People, it’s good to be back once again and i missed every one of you guys. I have been away on a business trip and haven’t had much time on my hands to get a system and make a quick post. The few times i tried to scroll through with my mobile is not always the same as using a computer. It’s always difficult for me and i had no choice but to wait till when am back and yes, i am back now. Missed everyone of you and even missed been on this page typing a post. With wordpress i feel like a part of a big family even though i don’t get to see any of you face to face but then it’s become a part of my world.
Thank you all for being there and i will keep you posted soon. Ciao!

I chose to be happy despite all odds, I chose to be happy even when things are ‘not – so smiling’. I make that decision even when things are hard,difficult and pressing. Things have not been very pleasant in recent times, it’s been from one struggle to another and this has been very challenging but how i manage to smile and still be happy in the face of odds is the mindset i decide to wear in all of it. Yesterday, i met my cousin online and we got chatting and he said to me that am so happy anytime he meets me, am always excited about something and then i smiled and said to him “i chose to be happy”.

We are the ones who have the power to make this decision by ourselves and this is what i tell myself on days when it seems my legs cannot carry me anymore and days when it looks so bleak and depressing but then there is this guy on radio who is multi- talented and just makes me laugh  off da hook as i drive down to work and in that fifteen minutes that it takes me to get to work you see me laughing off and i do get some starry eyed looks as i drive by but i guess they should be used to seeing me like that now as my glass is always wound down.

I am not feeling so happy and then i remember he’s on radio and i just tune to him and before you know it am already laughing and happy that’s why my radio is permanently tuned to 97.7 Fm.

Look for that which makes you happy, that which livens your spirit up on days when it seems like the world is coming to an end on your head. Look on the bright side, speak to yourself powerful words that can see beyond that cloud, do that which is exciting, get out of that shell of depression to see the life, more like invite the light and life in and it will come to you.

I’ve recently been gaining extra weight that seem difficult to move on. I have sat down to think about what i can do to pull off the weight without it looking like too much of a big deal to me and then i remembered i love dancing and now i spend 20 minutes dancing to songs i like, jogging, walking as the music plays on. I have done it consistently for two weeks and i have lost 2kg (just checked it today). I am using that which i love doing to my own advantage (I’m staying in shape).

I chose to stay happy and stop bogging my life on a relationship that’s not working instead of making myself go through pain and wondering when he will call or not, if he would reply to a ping or message, and then get my hopes crushed (more like get my heart broken) when he doesn’t.

I chose to be happy and do that which pleases me to stay alive, healthy and happy. Have you made that decision for yourself today?

And yet another award and this time i got nominated by Island traveler. I thank him sincerely for this award and i will like to nominate four other people to be recipients to this award and i recommend you check their sites and you won’t be disappointed you did. They are:
1.http://amakaobi.blogspot.com

2.http://2yearsofhealing.wordpress.com

3.http://mydearu.wordpress.com

4.http://naijamuminlondon.blogspot.com

The rules for this award are as follows:

Thank your Liebster Blog award presenter on yur blog

2. Link back to the blogger who awarded you.

3. Copy and paste the award to your blog.

4. Nominate 5 blogs to receive this award.

5.Inform them of their nomination by leaving a comment on their blog.

The Kreativ Blogger Award for the year 2012 goes to NITA!!!! Its been one bumpy ride and am so grateful to my fellow blogger and sister worshipandswag on the nomination for this award.

Now to the 10 things about myself

1. I love to read and write. I guess you already know that by now if not i won’t be here in the first place….LOL

2.  When i talk too loudly or haggle over issues with someone i get a sore throat so just before that long argument, i weigh my options. Is it worth that sore?

3.I stick to principles of old, call me old fashioned if you like its just ME!

4.Could be stubborn at times especially for that which i believe in.

5.I think there’s something special about 2012 (not the world coming to an end though…..hahaha).

6.I’m still trying to grasp how to swim properly especially the part of raising my head up the waters to catch some air.

7.I really wish i could sing but don’t know why i can’t.

8.Working on losing the pounds gained at christmas. Need to look slick and trendy.

9. I love fine things, fine clothes, trendy fashion. It sure makes me see the beauty of life.

10. I will be a designer someday soon!

Now is time to pass the award to six more bloggers and in no particular order:

lscotthoughts.com – This woman writes soul touching poetry.

achingforpng.wordpress.com – Maiya, meet her and know her!

talinorfalin.wordpress.com – Talin, is a writer that bares it all out.

fashionlifeja.wordpress.com – CJ Allen, is a down to earth writer or should i say blogger, she makes an interesting read!

connieemeraldeyes.wordpress.com - Connie says ordinary things in an extraordinary way.

granbee.wordpress.com – oh granbee! What can i say about her? She’s lovable!

That’s all for now! Peace…..I’m outta here!

‘Nita

The past few days into this new year has rather been like a drag to me and most other Nigerians and it’s been from talks of fuel subsidy removal to protests ongoing in various states of Nigeria to the other and then the very genesis of all problems which seems to have calmed down all of a sudden (God help us………) Boko Haram.
Frankly speaking, politics has never been my thing but when the problems resulting from decisions made by people in top government is staring right at your face only then will you realize that politics is a part and parcel of who we are, the community we live in and the way we intend to mold our society all have politics as an index factor.
The story is a long one but I will try to cut it short and make it as understandable as possible without boring you. Fuel in Nigeria (Gas) has been sold in recent times for 65 naira a litre ($0.4 dollars), a subsidized rate which has been shouldered by the government of the federation. We have crude oil but do not have refineries and crude is taken outside the shores of the country, refined and then resold back to Nigerians at a higher rate.
Now the Federal Government has decided to remove the subsidy on fuel and it will then be sold at 141 per litre ($0.88 dollars) which is more than a 100 percent increase! Alarming! For a country where you have people living under a dollar per day? Isn’t this absurd?
That people have to pay twice the amount on anything they buy in the market and also have to pay twice in refilling their fuel tanks which also include their generator fuel tanks as there is no constant electricity and we thereby resort to generating our own electricity by ourselves as our government has failed us in that regard. It is a sorry sight I bet you would not want to have a taste of if avoidable.
The proposed plan by government is to remove the fuel subsidy isn’t a bad idea in itself if only Nigeria was an ideal state (am sorry, my thoughts). The plan is to use funds from fuel subsidy removal in building our own refineries such that we no longer have to export crude to be refined and then sold back to us at a higher price but then do we trust the government to keep such funds after so much sacrifices have been made by common Nigerians who have to contend with their old salaries (we’ve been on the fight for increased minimum wage for workers since last year which still remains unresolved in most states), curb their excesses (if they had any), walk twice as much on days they cannot afford the increased fare, eat a meal without a piece of meat as they can’t afford to and maybe just maybe, pull their children out of school when they fail to meet up, while top government officials live it off with cars fuelled at the expense of suffering taxpayers money, their home generators been fuelled also and trips abroad for medical checkup and an annual salary that could be used in building up to ten schools fully equipped!

Small businesses will have increased running costs and be forced to go under when not able to cope with it. My pain is why the masses are the only one to make the sacrifices and the senators and top government officials not feel a single pinch. Is this not their own Nigeria also? We say No to fuel subsidy removal and that’s been our song since January 1st 2012 when it was being announced and given to us as an unpleasant New Year gift! No to further marginalization and sidelining of some individuals! Democracy is a government of the people therefore the government has to listen to the people and not make autocratic decisions no matter “how good” they say these decisions are. The people trusted you with their votes and expect to be respected in return and not just sidelined at one corner.

2012 is going to be a great year and I hope we all make it work for ourselves. God bless Nigeria and God bless us all!
For those who have never seen me write like this on national issues, this is just a burning issue that’s been bogging my mind and I really needed to unleash my pent up emotions and if you didn’t find this an interesting read I hope when this issue is all trashed out and we are all smiling again that you will do but then again life always presents us with challenges that we have to conquer and get to the next stage. There’s no end to its drama until we get to heaven!

Credence goes to Bellanaija.com for the pictures!

As we enter into the new year, we should ponder on this thought (I am doing that already), it will save us from undue stresses of life and just like we shift chaff from rice, we will be able to shift that which we should try to change which is within our powers to and accept that which we cannot change and truth be told, there are stuffs which are beyond our reach no matter how much we try and so instead of giving into hopelessness, instead of weighing ourselves down and killing our spirit, we should ponder on this and leave the rest to God.

Happy New year to you all and i wish you a beautiful and successful 2012 in advance (The new year is less than 48 hours from me now). Have a blessed year!

What is love if not for a little incovenience? A little pain to us sometimes? Isn’t friendship meant to make us absorb a little incovenience, bear a little pain, make that extra mile even though it is killing us inside. I am so sick of people who say they are your friends and are never there in the moments when we need them the most. Is it in sickness? When you need that encouraging face just beside you. To encourage you to pull through                                                                                                           .

What about in moments when you just need someone to listen to you while you blab on and on. It’s really about nothing but you just want to let loose and someone to listen.                                

Please, don’t tell me you love me if you would take a swift drive when the temptations of life come. Don’t tell me you love me if you know the calls would suddenly stop at that point when all that i need is that voice to aid me through.

      The word “Love” has been bastardised. It has been misused and killed. The love that i have inside of me is what i have decided to share with those who will appreciaten it, those who need it even more than i do,those who i can see the love in their eyes even as their mouths might fail to express. The motherless children, the aged and widowed, those who have been forgotten and rejected by their very own, those who won’t throw your love back at your face. Go out this christmas and show love to these ones even if you feel so empty inside and all left alone. If you shared with them not  just money and gifts only but also your time which is highly valuable and will be appreciated!

         Just yesterday someone wrote into a program on TV saying he felt so less fulfilled despite all he had which was more than he had had in time past. According to him, he had more money now, more cars and investments but less joy and he felt more empty inside than he had ever felt. He wanted answers, he wanted love, he wanted all the things which money cannot buy. If i was the host of that program, this is what i would have told him, “Instead of searching for that acceptance and love, why don’t you give this love out to these ones who desire it the most and only the joy and spark in their eyes would ignite you and fill the void in you”.

       I’m talking so much from experience here and so in the spirit of xmas.Give and give and give! Please, don’t stop! And the love of christ which goes beyond human understanding will fill your hearts with so much joy, brighten your days and give you lasting peace which the world cannot give.                                                                            

        Peace………………………………………..I’m outta here!

                                                                                                                                                                                                             XX

                                                                                                                                                                                                            ‘Nita

Whoever said being a wife and a mother is not a full time job? I thought so myself then but that was then and am so so wrong……

My younger brothers came over to my house a few weeks back and since then its been a mothering job for me. Every day sees me running from the office first to the market especially on days when there is not enough food in the house and i have to rush to the market in order to get things to prepare supper. Its been like that so much that my friend and colleague says i have become a mother overnight. It is no fun most days when i have to stay up in traffic because i would have delayed so much in the market and by the time i finish and am on my way home, there will be so much influx of people returning from work and other businesses and the traffic which i so much hate and avoid would have caught up with me and there’s no running away because “Home i must go!”.

I have talked about the minuses but the pluses far outweigh the minuses. It’s been a bore just being home alone and in my idleness, i find myself doing things i really wished i shouldn’t have done but out of boredom i do like making an unnecessary phone call just because i have enough airtime on my phone or  just sitting idling away till i sleep off and it is such a BORE! Now they make me talk and am continuously shouting and you could even hear me if you tried “You guys have not washed the plates since i left home for work, how could you have both breakfast and lunch and the kitchen sink is stacked high with plates and you are just lying down watching TV………..”

After talking and i believe in their minds they feel i am nagging. I’m finally exhausted from the cooking and household chores and when i do sleep on the bed it is not because i am idle and am tired from reading a book or watching a movie but it will be because i am DEAD TIRED! Is this what full time mothers go through? And we have the effrontery to think that why we go to work they idle away their time? It’s all so wrong! Imagine having toddlers in the house aged 2, 4, 6. Do you know how many times you would shout and run after them to drop that knife they are playing with, how many times you have to clean that floor they’ve spilled milk or food on, how may times you have to scream at them to drop articles that could harm them especially when they keep trying to play with running wires connected to the TV, sockets or putting the switch off and on until you spank the hell out of them? By the time you realise it, its already evening and the man of the house is back and if he’s insensitive, he might say “Darling, please leave me alone, i can’t talk right now. I’m dead tired from work. You don’t know how it feels afterall you don’t work so you don’t understand”.

He would never know, he would never understand except you were both to switch places even for just a day only then will he realise that being a mom is a full time job!

The blessings are more than the pain and the memories we forever remain in your heart through life. It’s bittersweet as they say but its worth it! Kudos to all full time moms! You rock!